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Leaders Need to Know It’s Not Their Fault

I work with leaders who are at a moment in their careers when they decide to take things to the next level, and I see the same struggles again and again:

 

  • Leaders who are daunted by the need to constantly lead change in their organization
  • Leaders who are frustrated with encountering resistance from others
  • Leaders who don’t know how to drive their vision forward, particularly when they’re a specialist in a bigger organization 

 

If this sounds like you, dear leader, here’s what I want you to know: 

 

It’s not your fault. 

 

Past a certain scale and complexity, you can’t lead through expertise or control.


You’re no longer facing technical challenges, you’re facing complex challenges, and you need to lead through these not by solving problems, but by building relationships and cultivating curiosity.  

 

You are doing the best you can with the tools that you have: a set of tools that has served you and your organizations incredibly well for your whole career, but now, you’re navigating growing complexity. The world can’t be easily understood anymore.

 

If you are someone who has led through control in the past, but now you recognize that answers are no longer enough, stop kicking yourself and watch my video:

Leaders Need to Know It’s Not Their Fault 

 

In this video, I share why so many of the leaders I work with transform their impact once they shift from expertise-based leadership to curiosity-driven leadership, and how you can do the same.  Answers are rarely the key to leading through complexity.  Instead, we need to grow our ability to influence others.  

 

You can’t be everywhere at once: answering every question, solving small problems, making sure everyone is following the new SOP — that will leave you stretched thin and unable to lead effectively.

 

That’s why I created The C.L.E.A.R. Path to Executive Leadership, a program crafted after in-depth research and work with hundreds of leaders at global organizations. The C.L.E.A.R. Path focuses on strengthening key skills that every leader benefits from: Curiosity, Listening, Empowerment, Accountability, and Results. 

 

If you are leading change, and this sounds like something that could help you with your challenge, I’d love to hear from you. Click here to book a free 30-minute diagnostic call with me where you can tell me about the challenges you’re facing. Together, we can talk about how you’re trying to create lasting change in your organization. 

 

Book a free call with me here.

 

We’ll talk about your challenges and what kind of support you might need for the next part of your journey. In half an hour you could be unlocking new dimensions of how you can lead.

 

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Using The Friendly OODA Loop To Work with Resistance

My five-year-old was under the table, snuggled in his blanket, sucking his thumb with his favorite stuffy. 

 

Cute, right?

 

The only problem was that we were going to be late to school. Again. 

 

So, I pushed. I cajoled. Maybe, in a moment of weakness, I even tried to bribe. 

 

The worst thing is it seems like this happens every day. 

 

One of the things I notice about life is that I’m often interacting with the world as I wish it was instead of the world as it is. That can be a pain in the ass. 

 

I’ve heard this phrase in Buddhism as, “resistance to reality is the source of all suffering,” though dissatisfaction may be a better word.

 

I see this all the time in my approach to parenting. Boy, do I wish my five-year-old would move faster in the morning. Getting him out the door can be stressful, and ironically, that stress actually makes him move slower. Ugh. 

 

So, why does it keep happening every day? Because I’ve been trying to push things forward as I want them to be instead of working with things as they actually are.

 

This happens in our organizations too—when we make changes to the ways we work, when we ask team members to take on new roles or responsibilities, or when we try to lead with a power-down approach.

 

The lesson in business here is about dealing with resistance, and today, I’m going to teach you a tool to work with resistance more skillfully. 

 

Last time I shared with you the OODA loop — Observe, Orient, Decide, Act. 

 

Externally, we can use the OODA loop to disrupt our competition by orienting ourselves around changes in the external world.

 

In this video, I want to share the “friendly” OODA loop—the use case of the OODA loop that applies to our own organizations. We can call on it when we’re leading a change that involves humans (i.e. a situation that can create resistance). It’s both useful as a planning tool and as a way to influence people.

 

 

By considering how people might be impacted by a proposed change and understanding their orientation, we as leaders can engage with them in a supportive manner and help their orientation align with our desired outcome.

 

When we start to see resistance as data about a problem and learn to work with the resistance we encounter, we’ll build stronger relationships and get more done. That means we can do our work and lead our teams with more ease. We get to solve bigger problems and have greater influence to really change the way our organizations work.  That increased effectiveness gets us noticed and can bring us even more satisfying work, promotions, wealth, and ease.

The friendly OODA loop can really help you understand your impact on others and work around resistance to get collaboration and buy-in. Working skillfully with resistance is one of the most important abilities a modern leader needs. 

 

If you want more resources on how to better work with resistance, I invite you to watch my free video on Understanding the Levels of Resistance. It’s short and it sheds light on the different types of resistance you might encounter from shareholders or people on your team.

 

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